by James Hyland

My name is Eddie, people say I'm mean,

I grew my first mullet when I was thirteen

But it’s a quarter past 2am, I'm outside a bar,

I got a gun in my hand, I got a getaway car

Well I got 2 boys, named 'em Hank and Bleu,

They're both seventeen, they got mullets, too

We’ll hit the bar boys and when the lights get low,

It's the same routine son, get the money and go

It looks like I go through life without a care,

You've seen me at the Farm Aid, airshows & the county fair

We’ll pull up slow and idle by the dock,

Hank take my pistol, and go rob that ole bait shop

To look at me well you'd never know

That I come from a trailer park with Meth and tornadoes

I hear 2 shots ring out and I see Hank run,

His hands are filled with some bloody money and a smoking gun

Hank's mullet ain't too long, it's a just five and ten,

It got cut 9 months ago down in the county pen

Well I remember the first time my boy ever got in a jam,

A thirteen year old he was smoking Kools in a stolen Trans Am

Now Hanks half brother Bleu his mom is from the ridge,

Yeah he's got a rat-tail, now that's a mullet hybrid

His momma's got a hairdo, this thing needs a bottle of spray,

It's a perm French mullet that all the boys, they call it moullette

This'll be the last night I ever see my home,

I just hopped in my Camaro, I was just gonna buy me a new Goody comb

But there was a roadblock waiting right up ahead,

It turned out at the bait shop the owner ended up dead

Na, there ain't no turning around, they're outside my door,

I'm surrounded by 8, 9 cops, ten, hell there’s may be more

I know what went down, their description fit,

They were looking for mullets and boys I was in deep…

In my jail cell, my bed is cold

They just give bologna sandwiches

They never give ya no chance at parole

But I know better, I got ole Hank and Bleu

They’re digging a tunnel,

They’re coming after you know who

They’re digging a tunnel,

They’re coming after you know who